I admit it has been hard to write during, and about the COVID 19 virus. My primary thoughts have centered around our interpretations of what it means to live in a democracy. Democracy as a concept is about governance by the whole. I’m struck at the persistent cries of those who assert their individual rights – “you can’t tell me to wear a mask.” True, being forced to wear a mask is called an autocracy, not a democracy. In an autocracy, if you are told to wear a mask, you do it or risk the consequences for non-compliance. It’s in a democracy where we have the luxury of acting for the good of the whole. I’m sad that many elected officials have veered away from the notion of acting for the good of the whole. OK, enough said.

On another subject, how has this pandemic tapped your resiliency? I’ve reintroduced myself to cross-stitching (it really can pass the time), zoom calls with friends, actually reading most of The New Yorkers I am accumulating, and taking long walks listening to audible. I’ve spent time doing absolutely nothing; binge watched Homeland – working on Ozark. I’ve made some complicated recipes with success. I’ve sat with my emotions and let them wash over me. I’ve missed hanging with my friends. I’ve enjoyed my time with Steve – a surprise. I love just sitting in the morning with a good cup of coffee and watching Morning Joe. And yes, I’m dealing with my restless soul that wants to see Baby Bailey, drive the Alcan with Wendy, and visit our VT. home and friends.

As we all continue to navigate this ongoing challenge, let us be mindful of the gifts we have, the challenges we face, and the choices we can make to care for our communities. In our most stressful time, pause and remember that kindness is contagious; kindness helps soothe a fearful heart; kindness is about all of us, not me and them. By caring for ourselves and others, we can be the leaders who guide us through this time of uncertainty.

From The New York Times:

Putting Down Your Phone May Help You Live Longer

By raising levels of the stress-related hormone cortisol, our phone time may also be threatening our long-term health.

https://www.nytimes.com/2019/04/24/well/mind/putting-down-your-phone-may-help-you-live-longer.html

Simply put, words do matter. In the words of the late Dr. Judith Glaser, “Words create Worlds.”

This past weekend Steve and I were fortunate to spend time with two young college students. Shyann, a student at John Jay College, and Jana, a student at Sarah Lawrence College and the daughter of my dear friend Hadeel. Their visit left Steve and me feeling more optimistic about the future of this country. I hope you enjoy the article from Guest Author, Shyann Cooks. 

Below is the preface to an article by Alexandra Natapoff. I have attached a link to the full article. Why should we care about this subject? An acquaintance of mine recently contested her traffic violation with the Vermont Traffic Bureau. Her only avenue to fight the ticket was to appear in court. There are no other options.

My father was a politician most of my childhood. The right AND responsibility to vote was part of my upbringing.

  I took my car to the dealership where we purchased it for an oil change and routine maintenance.  The dealership owners keep a refrigerator full of 4-ounce water bottles – very considerate of them. I finished one and, and getting ready for my second, asked an employee if they had a recycle for the empty plastic bottle. He said no and told me to toss it in the wastebasket.

Over many years as a consultant, trainer, and educator, I have been asked to provide training to build teamwork among employees. I’ve done lots of these training over the years. Recently I had the unexpected experience of working as a team, and this blog will share my surprising learning’s from experience.

Donald Trump recently and publicly tweeted that he is against domestic violence. Since the opposite of against is approval, this position seems like a logical no-brainer. It is also a perfect example of binary thinking.

So much of our time can be caught up in the mundane  - just staying current on daily living with work and chores can be enough. My husband Steve and I decided to break our routine and head to Washington D.C. for the march. We were two among thousands of people who came out to protect our democracy.

On a recent trip to visit my brother and sister-in-law in Williamsburg, Virginia, Steve and I navigated the perils of I-95 through NYC, Baltimore, and Washington, DC. The infamous hazards include texting drivers, constant roadwork, and more than a handful of multiple car accidents.

I was listening recently to a podcast and was struck by the statement, “compassion is good for business.” Over the subsequent days, I thought about compassion, how to access it, its role in leadership, and in general, compassion’s value when deeply rooted in our overall humanity.

As we head into a new and surprising presidency, we are experiencing more tumult than usually accompanies the traditionally peaceful transition of power in our democracy. We are witnessing the appointment of “business” people to cabinet positions who have little or no experience in running governmental organizations.  This has led to widespread concerns about the difference between running an organization focused on profit for those who own a piece of the corporation (stockholder) and those who have no stake in its success.  

Recently my husband Steve celebrated his 71st birthday. In 1995, my father died at the age of 71. I have a choice here – which filter will I use to live my life to its fullest? I could certainly choose to worry that my husband’s age has some weird correlation to my father, my father’s health issues, and my father’s genetics. Or, I could clean that filter and see my husband for who he is today. A robust, funny, cognitively sharp, energetic husband, father, and grandfather. I choose the later.

My trifecta happens December 25th through December 31st – Christmas, my birthday, and New Years Eve. This year instead of speeding through a whirlwind of activities, I decided to slow down, take a breath, and to coach... myself.I was determined to ask and answer some important questions about my 2015 and upcoming 2016.

As I stepped back and thought about my year, the overwhelming sense of gratitude for my good health struck me as I considered the vulnerable events that occasionally popped up to remind me of the brevity of life.

Marshall Goldsmith’s new book is titled Triggers (2015). The timing of its publication is particularly meaningful for me as I had an upfront and still resonating experience with one of my triggers. Goldsmith defines a behavioral trigger as any stimulus that impacts our behavior. It can be direct or indirect; internal or external; anticipated or unexpected; encouraging or discouraging, and productive and counter-productive.